Wednesday, November 28, 2012

My "A Ha" Moment

Yesterday was a rough day.
I got it one accident & avoided very closely…2 more.
First…B&I were rear ended & then later…on our way home, now in 2 separate cars…I dodged a dog in the middle of the street, on a country road, with absolutely no lights…and then…a very large deer. It darted directly in front of my car & if I hadn't been paying close attention & not slammed on my brakes (and I mean, everything flying off my seats, pedal to the metal slammed)…it would have been over. 
All in one day.
As you can imagine…I was a little shaken today, and absolutely did not want to drive.
But last night, as I laid my head to rest…it hit me.
You see, for a very long time now…I haven't been living. Breathing, but not truly living. 
Waiting for this to be perfect, and that to be right, and me to be "me" again.
Not using my new purses or driving my brand new car, until I deserve them.
Not signing up for singing lessons until I'm cute enough. Because the two are directly related, right?
Crazy I know.
Not taking yoga & pilates classes until I lose a few more pounds. Yep…that makes the most sense.
I know.
And so on. And on.
With tears streaming down my cheeks & B's arms around me…the lesson, my "a ha" moment…just came over me.
It felt like God was speaking to me & asking me how bad I wanted to live. When would I begin to live again?  How bad did I want to be here? Would I use my life to it's fullest & to my fullest? 
The answer…my answer was YES!!! Absolutely 100%…YES!!!
And with that moment…I was changed.
Life REALLY is a gift, and if you wait until you feel you're "enough"…it may be too late.
Not tomorrow. Not next week, month, year…RIGHT THIS MINUTE.
We've all heard the saying, "If you don't use it…you lose it", and in that moment…that's exactly how I interpreted my message.
Life is meant to be lived.
Meant to be abundant & beautiful.
Meant for us to get everything possible out of it, and one day leave this earth…with nothing.
Completely empty.
Empty because we gave life our all!
So…gorgeous ones…this is my message to you.
If you're insane like me & haven't been living "your very best life"…it's NEVER too late to begin the rest of your life.
I'm here, I love you, I believe in you, & I'm rooting for you us! 
So from here on out…
let us vow to grab life by the balls (LOL) & leave this earth…empty!

Bobby & I are completely fine. Damage to our car, of course, but us…THANK YOU, JESUS…not a scratch. And the other driver…the very same. 

If you've ever had an "a ha" moment…I'd love to hear all about it.

Thank you ALL…for adding SO MUCH JOY to my life & SO MUCH LOVE…in my heart.
I love you & I am oh so grateful.
To the newest members of our VKKD Family…I welcome you…with ALL the warmth in the world!
Thank you SO much for being here!


And as a little token of my gratitude…

SO Grateful, SO Blessed, & SO…ALIVE!


Jenna said...

Dearest V,

I am so glad to hear that you and your love are safe and sound! What a scary day! I hope your nerves have calmed some!

There are days that I just get by, but don't really live. I feel that I am stuck in a place that I don't know how to get out of. It sucks and can be extremely discouraging. I don't know how to change it, though I know I need too.

I hope that you live your life exactly the way you want too. You ARE deserving of the new bags and the new car. I hope you know that!

You are such a beautiful person, inside and out. Thank you for blessing my life!

all my love xxoo

K said...

V- You are SUCH an Inspiration!!! THANK YOU for sharing your story and your personal journey!

Love you to pieces!!!


Maria Sandoval said...

Welcome to the other side of the bridge. Much love to you girlie! ��

Brandi said...

glad u guys are ok. Such a great post!

Susan said...

OMG Veronika!
That is awful. I told you the other day via is short. Today is the funeral of a dad who has 3 girls at our school. 42 years old. Stomach cancer. Life is short.
Drive the damn car! Use the damn purses. Every day.
You are amazing. xo